Magic; A Poem Revisited

I’m very pleased with the progress that I have made in revising this poem. However, I don’t consider it fully revised yet….it feels incomplete somehow. I’m going to do further mulling this week, but for the moment, here is where she’s at:


6a Magic speaks in whispers,

7b Running gently through the wood;

7c It prances over rivers;

7c And refracts light in shivers.

6d It winks from each flower,

7e Glinting off of crystal dew.

7f ‘tis the sweetness in the air;

7f Painting colors barely there.


6g Magic enchants your eyes;

7h Playing just beyond the touch.

7i It beckons the golden bee;

7i And adorns the fruited tree.

6j It is the bird’s trilled song;

7k The pattern of growing moss.

7l In the shade it romances;

7l And in sunlight it dances.


As always, I encourage people to critique my work and share their thoughts. I don’t know exactly what needs to be changed or added to this poem, but, to me, it doesn’t feel quite done.